Ah, Christmastide. It’s that magical time of year when relatives you hardly know come to visit, and suddenly you wish you were trapped on a deserted island. It’s a time for music and presents and bows and ribbons and who knows what else. Anyway, how much do you really know about this revered season of giving?
Try to solve without Googling first.
Spoiler Alert – Answers are at bottom of page.
1) In 1965, which was the first Christmas song ever played in space?
a) Jingle Bells
b) Joy to the World
c) Silent Night
d) Angels We Have Heard on High
e) Grandma Got Run Over by a Spaceship
2) What was unusual about Christmas in the American colonies from 1659-81?
a) Santa Claus wore a leisure suit
b) Puritans actually drank alcohol
c) The feast bird was wild sparrow
d) Christmas was actually banned
3) Which is NOT an alternate name previously used for Santa’s reindeer?
a) Flossie
b) Glossie
c) Scratcher
d) Feckless
e) Mangy
4) True or False – In the early 1900s, Christmas tree lights were so expensive they were actually rented instead of sold.
5) According to Facebook, what is unique about December 11th each year?
a) It is the busiest shopping day of the year
b) It is the best night to view the Christmas Star
c) It is the ideal day to “unfriend” an annoying person
d) It is the most common day for the break up of couples
6) What did the Roman emperor Diocletian do to the real St. Nicholas?
a) Lavished him with gifts and property
b) Made him a co-emperor of the realm
c) Built him a stately castle
d) Imprisoned him for five years
7) How long does it take to film a Hallmark Christmas movie?
a) Two weeks
b) Two months
c) Two years
d) Scientists don’t care in the least
8) In the 1800s, what was an alternate color for Santa’s suit?
a) Green
b) Blue
c) Brown
d) All of the Above
e) None of the Above
9) True or False – Theodore Roosevelt actually banned Christmas trees in the White House.
10) How many total gifts are in the Twelve Days of Christmas song?
a) 12
b) 8
c) 264
d) 364
e) Nobody has ever bothered to count them
11) How do women in the Czech Republic receive marriage advice on Christmas Day?
a) Kris Kringle leaves them an explanatory note in their stockings
b) A possible suitor leaves them a box of chocolates on their porch step
c) A church bell is rung three times to say a bachelor is available
d) A shoe is thrown over the shoulder to see where it points
e) A vat of egg nog is consumed until the woman passes out and stops caring
12) In South Africa, instead of traditional turkey or ham, what is eaten on Christmas Day?
a) Roasted venison cutlets
b) Pickled pheasant
c) Broiled bald eagle
d) Deep-fried caterpillars
13) A town in Sweden celebrates Christmas each year by:
a) Rolling a giant wooden cheese wheel down Main Street
b) Making crude jokes about Norwegian and Finnish citizens
c) Setting a giant straw goat on fire in the town square
d) Giving foot massages to hundred of tired mall elves
14) What happens in Scandinavia if a family doesn’t leave porridge for the Christmas sprites?
a) The sprites don’t leave the children any gifts
b) The sprites kill one of the cows in the barn
c) They pour Sprite all over the driveway
d) They toilet paper the family home
e) Scientists don’t care in the least
___________________________________________________________________________
Answers:
1 a
2 d
3 e
4 True
5 d
6 d
7 a or d
8 d
9 True
10 d
11 d
12 d
13 c
14 b or e
Scoring:
14 correct – You have been selected as the Official Mall Santa
10-13 correct – You even love those overpriced cheeseballs
5-9 correct – You like Christmas but are ready for spring weather
1-4 correct – You are allergic to gifts, joy, and flying reindeer
0 correct – You must spend the rest of the winter inside a giant hollowed-out candy cane with Taylor Swift and Justin Bieber while they sing rare Finnish Christmas carols and play lame German board games and eat assorted low-sodium British baked goods
